The past 8 months of my life....
That is what this post has contained for the past few weeks, not even a complete sentence, mainly because I really don't know how to start it. It should be fairly easy seeing as it is my life and I was there, I know what happened, how it happened to me, and how I have been since then.
The fact is that the past 8 months of my life have been hard.
If I had to sum the past 8 months of my life up into three words, they would be: hard, scary, and traumatic.
Never good words.
These hard, scary, and traumatic 8 months started last August (so, I guess it has been like 9 months, but that would make it sound like I was pregnant...and I'm not!)...
It was maybe the second or third week in August, I can't exactly remember. Classes had started and I was getting into the swing of things, my new schedule and work load. One of my friends told me that she had a friend who was in charge of coordinating volunteers for En Fuego. En Fuego is a Christian music festival that lasts only for a weekend. I had never been to one, but had heard about it and ususally enjoyed all the bands that went. Well, my friend and I ended up being able to volunteer on the Saturday shift. We arrived at the festival, got to listen to great music and work the table for Kutless, who was the headliner act for the weekend. It was pretty awesome!
We were staying at my friends house since she lived near the venue. Sunday morning instead of heading straight back to school, we were going to go to church.
We never made it.
We left my friend's house with plenty of time to get to the church. It had been raining earlier that morning, but had since stopped leaving the roads a little wet. I didn't really know this area, so I didn't know how far away from the church we were, but we still had plenty of time to get there. We topped this hill and I saw a car sitting off on the right, waiting it's turn. We continued down the hill and I noticed that the car was starting to pull out, but I thought that he had noticed us and would stop.
He didn't.
Right before the cars collided, I remember bracing myself in the passenger seat, closing my eyes, and thinking in my head, "Oh, shit."
I remember the impact.
I remember somewhat of the car spinning around.
But, honestly, I think I blacked out.
I remember opening my eyes and coughing so hard from the air bag powder that was flying everywhere!
Then, I just started saying, "We gotta get out of the car! We gotta get out of here!"
I didn't know if the car was on fire or really what was happening, I just knew that we needed to get out of the car.
I pushed open the passenger side door and stepped outside.
My friend came over to the side I was on to see if I was okay.
She said that once the car stopped spinning, she started calling my name, but I didn't answer.
I asked her if she could get my glasses because they had flown off my head and landed in the floorboard.
I had so much adrenaline pumping through my body that for the few seconds I didn't have my glasses on, I had perfect vision. I could see everything.
Then, I remember putting my unbroken glasses back on and pulling them off again, my vision had returned to normal, or well, how it is now.
My friend and I went to the backside of her car where a woman was coming up to us.
She asked if we were okay and had informed us that she had called 911 and that an ambulance was on it's way.
We assured her that we were fine, except for some minor burns and major seatbelt bruising.
My friend then asked how the man was doing
and
that is when I remembered that we had hit another car.
I will never forget what I saw when I looked over there.
Shortly after, my friend's mom had arrived.
We had more ladies surrounding us and they began to pray for us.
They stayed with us throughout the entire thing.
I don't remember their names and barely remember their faces, but I am thankful and grateful for them.
The man that we hit was an older man, also on his way to church.
He normally didn't drive himself anywhere, but that morning, he decided he wanted to drive to church.
He never made it to church either.
Unlike, my friend and I, he didn't walk away from the scene.
He was killed on impact.
We met some of his family that same morning, at the scene of the accident.
They assured us that he was a Christian.
They told us they were sorry we were the ones in the other car.
They made sure we knew, that they didn't blame us for the accident.
They wanted us to know and be assured that there wasn't anything we could do.
That it was an accident, just that, nothing more.
I had never been involved in an accident before. This was my first one. I pray that I will never have to experience that again.
I pray that no one has to experience it.
I know that I'm not the only one that has experienced something like that.
Healing takes awhile.
Sometimes, longer than you wish.
I've had my share of flashbacks and nightmares and they probably aren't completely gone yet.
But, I know that in that moment, the hand of God was on me and my friend.
He protected and shielded us, just as He has promised.
And He welcomed another child Home that day.
Hard, scary, traumatic.
That is what this post has contained for the past few weeks, not even a complete sentence, mainly because I really don't know how to start it. It should be fairly easy seeing as it is my life and I was there, I know what happened, how it happened to me, and how I have been since then.
The fact is that the past 8 months of my life have been hard.
If I had to sum the past 8 months of my life up into three words, they would be: hard, scary, and traumatic.
Never good words.
These hard, scary, and traumatic 8 months started last August (so, I guess it has been like 9 months, but that would make it sound like I was pregnant...and I'm not!)...
It was maybe the second or third week in August, I can't exactly remember. Classes had started and I was getting into the swing of things, my new schedule and work load. One of my friends told me that she had a friend who was in charge of coordinating volunteers for En Fuego. En Fuego is a Christian music festival that lasts only for a weekend. I had never been to one, but had heard about it and ususally enjoyed all the bands that went. Well, my friend and I ended up being able to volunteer on the Saturday shift. We arrived at the festival, got to listen to great music and work the table for Kutless, who was the headliner act for the weekend. It was pretty awesome!
We were staying at my friends house since she lived near the venue. Sunday morning instead of heading straight back to school, we were going to go to church.
We never made it.
We left my friend's house with plenty of time to get to the church. It had been raining earlier that morning, but had since stopped leaving the roads a little wet. I didn't really know this area, so I didn't know how far away from the church we were, but we still had plenty of time to get there. We topped this hill and I saw a car sitting off on the right, waiting it's turn. We continued down the hill and I noticed that the car was starting to pull out, but I thought that he had noticed us and would stop.
He didn't.
Right before the cars collided, I remember bracing myself in the passenger seat, closing my eyes, and thinking in my head, "Oh, shit."
I remember the impact.
I remember somewhat of the car spinning around.
But, honestly, I think I blacked out.
I remember opening my eyes and coughing so hard from the air bag powder that was flying everywhere!
Then, I just started saying, "We gotta get out of the car! We gotta get out of here!"
I didn't know if the car was on fire or really what was happening, I just knew that we needed to get out of the car.
I pushed open the passenger side door and stepped outside.
My friend came over to the side I was on to see if I was okay.
She said that once the car stopped spinning, she started calling my name, but I didn't answer.
I asked her if she could get my glasses because they had flown off my head and landed in the floorboard.
I had so much adrenaline pumping through my body that for the few seconds I didn't have my glasses on, I had perfect vision. I could see everything.
Then, I remember putting my unbroken glasses back on and pulling them off again, my vision had returned to normal, or well, how it is now.
My friend and I went to the backside of her car where a woman was coming up to us.
She asked if we were okay and had informed us that she had called 911 and that an ambulance was on it's way.
We assured her that we were fine, except for some minor burns and major seatbelt bruising.
My friend then asked how the man was doing
and
that is when I remembered that we had hit another car.
I will never forget what I saw when I looked over there.
Shortly after, my friend's mom had arrived.
We had more ladies surrounding us and they began to pray for us.
They stayed with us throughout the entire thing.
I don't remember their names and barely remember their faces, but I am thankful and grateful for them.
The man that we hit was an older man, also on his way to church.
He normally didn't drive himself anywhere, but that morning, he decided he wanted to drive to church.
He never made it to church either.
Unlike, my friend and I, he didn't walk away from the scene.
He was killed on impact.
We met some of his family that same morning, at the scene of the accident.
They assured us that he was a Christian.
They told us they were sorry we were the ones in the other car.
They made sure we knew, that they didn't blame us for the accident.
They wanted us to know and be assured that there wasn't anything we could do.
That it was an accident, just that, nothing more.
I had never been involved in an accident before. This was my first one. I pray that I will never have to experience that again.
I pray that no one has to experience it.
I know that I'm not the only one that has experienced something like that.
Healing takes awhile.
Sometimes, longer than you wish.
I've had my share of flashbacks and nightmares and they probably aren't completely gone yet.
But, I know that in that moment, the hand of God was on me and my friend.
He protected and shielded us, just as He has promised.
And He welcomed another child Home that day.
Hard, scary, traumatic.
I am hurting for you and praying for you! May you be given peace in this difficult time.
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